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JP: Five Things Your Spanish Teacher Won't Teach You. Welcome everyone, this is JP and I’m here with Fernando.
Fernando: Hello everyone.
JP: Today we’ve got a list of five things your Spanish teacher doesn’t teach you. I’m a Spanish teacher; so you’re gonna tell me that my teaching is incomplete?
Fernando: I don’t have the credentials to say that.
JP: Is that what you’re accusing me of?
Fernando: I’m not accusing you of anything.
JP: So what is this list of five things that I’m not teaching people?
Fernando: These are five things, among many other things that you will not get in a classroom. It’s more the jargon, the colloquial, the informal conversations you’ll have.
JP: Oh, for goodness sakes, we don’t have time for that in the classroom, so you have to learn that from your friends, right?
Fernando: You want to learn these things from your friends, of course.
JP: So what’s the first thing on your list of 5 things your Spanish teacher doesn’t teach you?
Fernando: check this out, dude, alright dude? You see what I mean dude?
JP: You’re calling me dude a lot.
Fernando: I’m calling you dude! Because we’re friends.
JP: Is this part of the list?
Fernando: When you’re speaking in Spanish, you also want to know the ‘dude’ words.
JP: So there are words that mean ‘dude.’ How many? Are there more than one?
Fernando: It varies, honestly. In Spain, for example, we can use “tío” or “tía”
JP: I’ve heard that. It means “uncle.” And “tía” is for a woman, it means “aunt.”
Fernando: Yes, so obviously you want to use it with the right gender. In spain, I would call you “tío,” if you were with your sister, I’d call her “tía.”
JP: What do they say in South America?
Fernando: Let’s look at Argentina. eh, che…
JP: That’s right! They’re always saying “che.” Is it different for men and women? Is there a feminine form?
Fernando: No. In the Caribbean, you have, “oye chico.”
JP: That’s true; Cubans are always calling people “chico.” “Chico” usually means small.
Fernando: Chico can be small in age, or small in height.
JP: But in the Caribbean, when people are calling you “chico” it just means dude.
Fernando: Right. “Chico” for male, “chica” for female. In Mexico, we have “guey.” That’s one of the 5 things your Spanish teachers will not teach you…
JP: The “dude” words. I hope you wrote those down. Alright, what’s the next category of things your Spanish teacher wont’ teach you.
Fernando: “Wow” words.
JP: You can’t just say “wow” in Spanish?
Fernando: You could say “wow,” but usually you’ll hear “híjole, ándale, vaya, caray, jolín…”
JP: Are these regional also,
Fernando: They are regional, but you can use them interchangeably within each country.
JP: Ok, what’s your favorite “wow” word?
Fernando: My favorite ‘wow’ word, if we’re keeping it PG, would be “híjole.”
JP: ¡Híjole! That´s a Mexican “wow” word. I know my friend from Spain is always saying, “guao.”
Fernando: That’s a good one, I’ll use it as well.
JP: And my friend from Miami is always saying “caray.” ¡Qué caray! Alright, so we have the “dude” words, the “wow” words… what’s next?
Fernando: Pedo.
JP: “Pedo” means fart. So your Spanish teacher is not teaching you about pedo.
Fernando: Not unless she’s a biology major as well…
JP: OK, so what’s so special about “pedo.”
Fernando: It has many meanings.
JP: So one meaning is “fart,” obviously.
Fernando: “¿Qué pedo?” what’s up?
JP: So literally this is “what fart,” but when someone says “¿qué pedo?” they’re saying “what’s up!”
Fernando: Exactly.
JP: And can you high five them at that point?
Fernando: You can, if that’s your means of greeting. I would go with a handshake… “No hay pedo” is like ‘no worries.’
JP: ‘No big deal.’ ‘No sweat.’
Fernando: There’s also “qué buen pedo.”
JP: That would be like “what a cool feeling” or “what a good vibe.” Now these last for meanings had absolutely nothing to do with farting.
Fernando: No. And ‘pedo’ can also mean “drunk…” your level of drunkenness.
JP: Oh… I’ve definitely heard that a lot.
Fernando: So “qué buen pedo traigo” is “I’m very buzzed.”
JP: So drinking past the ‘buen pedo’ is probably going to be a ‘mal pedo,’ right?
Fernando: Yeah, “estoy muy pedo.”
JP: That’s “too drunk.”
Fernando: Estoy demasiado pedo, me puse demasiado pedo…
JP: I got too drunk.
Fernando: “Ya no estoy pedo,” I’m not drunk anymore… This is the one you want to make sure you understand.
JP: Now can I use any of these forms of “pedo” in my Spanish classroom? My Spanish teacher didn’t teach me them. Can I say them?
Fernando: You want to avoid such an informal way of speaking in the classroom, especially in a formal environment.
JP: So none of those “pedo”s work in the classroom.
Fernando: None of them. Biological or otherwise.
JP: That’s three of the five things your teacher doesn’t teach you in Spanish. What’s the next one?
Fernando: And it’s always to compliment. “Hola, guapo.” Hey good-looking.
JP: I’ve heard that one a lot…
Fernando: Yeah, right… “Hola guapa.”
JP: Well, are there other words you can use besides “guapo” and “guapa”?
Fernando: “Bonito”; “linda”; “bella”; “hermosa”.
JP: These are all words that kind of mean the same thing. It’s all referring to attractiveness.
Fernando: Yes. For example, in Chile you can say,”Hola guapa, hola guapo,” or you can say”poroto”, “porota”, “porotito”, “porotita”… Which is actually a bean… It’s a term of endearment.
JP: Now you know, I actually tried to teach my students to compliment each other.
Fernando: They should. And it’s a great way of building trust.
JP: It was creepy, though; it didn’t work. My students weren’t natural at it. They had to practice, then practice and practice.
Fernando: Well remember, it’s a cultural thing. It’s not something you go into immediately. And it’s perfectly ok if you greet someone without using those affectionate words.
JP: But usually, Latinos will compliment each other more often than say, Americans do.
Fernando: Yes, we tend to do that. We’ll notice something almost every day: if they’ve changed their look, if they’re wearing an new piece of clothing…
JP: If there’s food on their face, if they’re getting fatter… That’s four, and you have five things that your Spanish teacher didn’t teach you; so what’s number five?
Fernando: Using ‘cool’ in Spanish.
JP: So what do you say in Spanish?
Fernando: “Padre”… That’s super Mexican. If you’re in Colombia you wouldn’t say “qué padre” but they would where you’re coming from.
JP: So what would you say in Colombia?
Fernando: “Chévere.”
JP: That’s South America, right? The northern part…
Fernando: In Spain they would say “qué guay.” And also in Mexico “chido”. “Está chido eso.” That’s cool. “Qué chido.” How awesome.
JP: So Mexico we’ve got “qué chido”, “qué padre”. In South America, we have “chévere”, and then in Spain, they say “guay”.
Fernando: We’ve covered quite a good amount of ground, I think.
JP: I think so too. Alright folks, we hope you enjoyed All About Spanish 13. We’ll be back in the next podcast with All About 14. I hope you enjoyed it. So for now it’s time to go. Bye!
Fernando: Bye-bye!

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